A lot of experts recommend that having one or more mentors is an important aspect of developing your career. Being a mentor can be just as valuable. The problem with finding or being an effective mentor is that many people who are very accomplished in a particular area, may not have the skills to lead someone through the thinking that takes you from the problem to an insight to action and accountability – the keystones of breakthrough performance.

Years ago, I asked the finance manager where I worked if he would be willing to be my mentor. It was scary for me at the time. He was very smart, younger than I was by a decade, but higher up in management, and he knew finance like nobody else I had ever worked with. He was very abrupt, but I thought if he was being my mentor, he might soften his approach and it could improve our working relationship.

Math had always been a weakness for me and budgets and financial reports – full of numbers – seemed so daunting. The first couple of times  I brought him an issue I was struggling with, he  immediately showed me where the answer to my question could be found, or where the error was.  It helped in the short-run, but I didn’t learn from the experience so I could do it myself the next time. If I asked clarifying questions, he would roll his eyes and tell me to just do it the way he said to do it. Eventually, I stopped asking for his guidance. It was a mentoring match that simply didn’t work.

Practical mentoring skills can be learned and ultimately, mastery will make mentors better managers and leaders, while preparing mentees and proteges for the future.

The key things a professional mentor needs to be able to do are:

1. Develop a rapport with the protege/mentee to build trust and make it safe for open and constructive communication. Start by asking for and receiving your mentoring partner’s permission to delve into the problem.

2. Observe patterns in behavior and your mentoring partner’s ability to produce results – this allows the mentor to see what the protege or mentee cannot see from their point of view.

3. Listen to the core of the problem as identified by the protege/mentee – there is valuable insight in their take on what is happening or not happening.

4. Ask reflective questions that lead the protege/mentee through a problem-solving process that has them do all of the heavy thinking. Examples of reflective questions are:

What was the result you were trying to produce?

What actions did you take to get there?

How close to your goal did you get?

What do you think worked about what you did?

If you had to do this sales call, presentation, etc. again, what would you do differently?

In thinking through and answering these kinds of questions, the mentee has the best opportunity of getting to an “aha” moment. When he/she discovers their own answers, they can truly own the solutions.

5. Create a Specific, Measurable, Achievable Result in Time – SMART and a feedback method that works for both of you. This is what allows the mentor the opportunity to be supportive and encourage the mentee as he or she practices new behaviors, techniques  and ways of being.

This method initially takes more time than showing someone how to do it, telling them what to do, or giving “constructive criticism.”  It allows a person to think through a problem and to learn from their experience, whether they succeed or fail. The more you do it, the more trust there is in the relationship between mentor and protege, the faster the questioning and thinking process becomes.

During college, I had a faculty adviser who became one of the most effective mentors to ever work with me. Sometimes, even now I ask myself the kind of question she would ask and it gets me going in the right direction. Like the time I had writer’s block and the deadline was nearing. I was writing a biographical account for an article and it just wasn’t coming together. I remember telling her how hard it was to write about this topic in the first person. She said, “What if you wrote as if it was about someone else?”

I had my “aha” moment right then and there. I said, “I can do that,” and went on to complete the article that evening. It was one of my best.

These kinds of conversations don’t come naturally to most people. In our training programs, we give mentoring partners the underpinnings for these conversations, opportunities to try them in a safe environment and to  see how they work. As effective as these conversations are in a mentoring partnership, they are also very useful in management, supervision and even parenting.

Has the door to the executive suite and the board room slammed shut for women? Is it still possible for other capable and talented women to join the ranks of leaders like Brenda C. Barnes, Chairman and CEO of Sara Lee, Andrea Jung, Chairman and CEO of Avon Products, Indra Nooyi, Chairman and CEO of Pepsico, and Patricia Woertz, Chairman, President and CEO of Archer Daniels Midland?

The evidence is disappointing. In a recent article, about the 2010 Catalyst Census: Fortune 500 Women Board Directors and the 2010 Catalyst Census: Fortune 500 Women Executive Officers and Top Earners, released Monday, December 13, Ilene H. Lang, Catalyst president and chief executive officer told FOX Business, “The first look at our census numbers over the last years shows little progress for women as top earners.”

• In 2010, women held 14.4% of executive officer positions, up from 13.5% in 2009 and only 7.6% of the top earning positions compared with 6.3% in 2009.
• Women held just 15.7% of board seats in 2010, a mere 0.5% gain over the 15.2% in 2009.

One bright aspect of the report, according to reporter, Barbara Mannino, showed that men and women with mentors were placed higher in their post-MBA first jobs, with men benefiting more than women over time. Men with mentors were 93% more likely than men without mentors to start out at middle management or above. Women with mentors increased their odds of being placed at mid-manager or above by only 56% over women who did not have mentors.

Throughout their careers, men received more promotions than women and higher salary increases. Each promotion earned men an extra 21% in compensation; for women, each promotion amounted to an extra 2%.

High- potential men and women with senior-level mentors advance further and earn more than those with less senior mentors. Overall, though, women’s compensation still lags men whether or not their mentor is at the top.

With top tier leadership and board rooms having so few women among their ranks, it is less likely these executives will choose a woman to mentor. Historically, leaders choose the person most likely to be just like them as their own careers advanced.

Forward-looking companies can boldly address this issue by creating and supporting mentorship programs that are open to a wider pool of future leaders. To launch such a program, both mentors and mentees should receive training that prepares both partners for success – regardless of gender, culture and generational differences.

Mentoring at the senior level is not about showing another how to do something, rather it is about cultivating the kind of thinking that experience provides. It includes being able to have a conversation that leads to insight, action, accountability, and learning. It provides a support system for the learning process. Finally, as the mentee proves herself it includes career sponsorship and network sharing to help her advance in her career.

Whenever I make a presentation, someone in the audience asks if there is a difference between mentoring, coaching, and counseling. Though the skills used for each are similar – asking reflective questions, active listening, summarizing, observing patterns, challenging assumptions, and providing support – they are fundamentally very different.

Here are some distinctions we use:

Mentoring– a developmental relationship between a more experienced “mentor” and a less experienced partner that typically involves the sharing of advice, resources and support for reaching specific goals. The mentor is experienced in a particular domain and shares that experience while bringing the protégé up the ranks.  It is a partnership between the two. Ideally, the protégé leads the relationship by asking for guidance and support. The relationship can occur in a formalized program or between two people who agree between them to work together for a period of time. In our work, the mentors and protégés work for the same company or belong to the same professional organization.

Coaching – a method of professional development that can be provided by a supervisor or a paid professional to attain a certain work behavior that will improve leadership, accountability, teamwork, sales, communication, goal setting, strategic planning and more. It can be provided in a number of ways, including one-on-one, group sessions and large scale organizational work. Business coaches often specialize in a specific practice area such as executive coaching, corporate coaching, small business and leadership coaching. A good business coach does not need to have specific business expertise and experience in the same field as the person being coached.

Counseling – counselors are professionals who are trained to diagnose and help a client with emotional problems, resolving issues from the past or a dysfunction. From time to time, a mentor or coach may find it useful to recommend counseling to a client or protégé.

If you’ve identified a need for strengthened leadership development programs for your employees or members, you could be considering a formal mentoring program. You know you have people who want mentors and you  have a group of more experienced people interested in being mentors. But, you also know being a mentor is not for everyone. Though your mentor candidates are willing – are they ready? Just because a person knows how to do something well and has years of experience doing it, doesn’t mean they have the skills to teach what they know.

For many people a mentoring session can become a game of Monkey See/Monkey Do: “This is the way I do this , it has always worked for me,  and this is how you should do it from now on.”

For others it becomes a trip down memory lane:  “Why, when I started in this industry, the computers still had green diode screens…”

Still others take on a Dear Abbey quality: “Now that I understand your problem, here is what you ought to do…”

These approaches do work in some instances, but they don’t  foster a culture of learning and open communication.  They don’t lead to the majority of people becoming proficient in breakthrough thinking and, ultimately causing increased productivity.  Rather, they can alienate the protégé/mentee, take too long to get to the point, and fail to produce lasting results.

What we have found to be useful in our programs, is to teach prospective mentors how to become keen observers, enhance their listening and emotional intelligence skills and for them to practice asking reflective questions that allow their protégés to dance with them toward insight and breakthrough.  These conversations can be so effective, that complex issues can be dealt with in just five to 15 minutes. Once learned in the context of the mentoring program, these skills will be useful for managers to use with all of their direct reports. Now that’s productive mentoring that leads a high return on investment.

For the most part, professional associations exist to educate their members. Most are very good at promoting relationship building among members by providing regular access to training and networking at meetings and conferences. Programs allow members to learn skills that will keep them employed, grow personally and professionally, stay current with industry trends, prepare for upward mobility, or enhance their marketability in these changing times.

The most effective training produces the best results when people incorporate new learning into their work immediately. Less experienced people may have difficulty in the day-to-day application of what they’ve learned because they need support and guidance to develop new habits. For many people, professional development workshops produce new insights, folders or notebooks full of notes that are never referred to again, and minimal change.

At Odyssey Mentoring, our clients report that more structured professional mentoring programs between young professionals and more experienced practitioners improve productivity and allow for richer relationships and breakthrough results. Program participants report relationships that are mutually satisfying to both mentors and protégés.

Generally, opportunities to receive one on one mentoring through professional association membership are accessible on an informal basis. This works when a member has an immediate, short-term need for coaching, advice, or brainstorming.

By offering a structured mentoring program through your association, you can provide a valuable member benefit that continually enhances the effectiveness of the training you currently provide, develops members’ careers regardless of where they work, and establishes your organization as the leader.

The Original Mentor

Have you ever wondered where the word “mentor” comes from?

In Homer’s epic poem, The Iliad, Odysseus, the king of Ithaca, left home to join the Trojan War. He left his son, Telemachus, with his trusted friend Mentor. For 20 years Odysseus’ military campaign and protracted journey home kept him away from his son, beloved wife, and country. Then in The Odyssey, the king returns and finds his son a grown and mature man he can be proud to call his son and the next king. Mentor’s wise and careful tutelage made that possible.

Screeeeech!!! Stop the presses! Here’s the part of the story that rarely gets retold.

It turns out, writes Homer, that Mentor was not a very good guide at all. He was so deficient, that Pallas Athena, the goddess of wisdom, who loved Odysseus, his family and kingdom, was moved to intercede. She went to her father, Zeus, received permission to inhabit Mentor’s body, and guide Telemachus herself.

And THAT is why Homer’s Mentor has become synonymous with teaching, guiding, and coaching. What we learn from this parable is that mentoring does not come naturally, just because someone knows how to do something. We also learn that for a mentoring program to be successful buy-in from upper management (Zeus…it doesn’t get much higher) is essential.

A mentor is a person who serves as a role model for leadership, personal growth and professional development. An effective mentor works with his or her protégé to develop and nurture new ways of thinking and acting that lead to breakthrough performance.

Anyone who wants to can become a great mentor.

At Odyssey Mentoring, we lead our clients on a journey where mentors and protégés are partners. Each dedicated to giving and getting the most out of their mentoring program. Each committed to making it work and becoming the person they are meant to be. No divine intervention needed, just good solid program design and training to set a solid foundation.

We help mentoring partners develop the skills they need to nurture breakthrough thinking and productivity. These skills include understanding how people think, learning to ask reflective questions, becoming a keen observer of patterns, and learning to share your network.

“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.” – Winston Churchill

Developing Leaders With Professional Mentoring

“We cannot hold a torch to light another’s path without
brightening our own.”– Ben Sweetland

More than ever before organizations need to develop future leaders, managers and workers who can adapt to constant changes in the marketplace, competitive and environmental threats, and rapid advances in technology. Overloaded managers and flattened organizations mean there is no career ladder for young people to climb. An effective mentoring program provides the experience that climbing that ladder used to provide.

Mentoring is one of the most effective ways to ensure that once you’ve hired the best and the brightest, you retain them long past the training period. Mentoring enhances loyalty by placing high potential employees on the fast track with the extraordinary benefit of senior level guidance. Solid training ensures your mentoring program’s participants will be able to make the most of the relationship producing the highest possible level of results.

Professional associations that offer mentoring programs are providing a member benefit that sets them apart. Regardless of where members are employed, they can take advantage of this opportunity to grow and develop within their profession. Their mentors will be leaders in their respective fields, people they might never get to work with under any other circumstances.

“…we must become more capable of handling change than ever before if we are to survive and thrive in the twenty-first century.”– Alvin Toffler

Mentoring programs deliver three proven outcomes:

1. Research has shown that training improves productivity by an average of 22.3%. Training combined with effective professional mentoring improves productivity by 88% or more.

2. Protégés form stronger bonds with you and your company. That means you will be able to count on them during tough times.

3. Costly employee turnover will be reduced because employees will themselves as and integral part of the organization’s future. They will feel appreciated while they enhance their skills, develop their ability to step into senior roles and responsibilities and increase their confidence and sense of satisfaction with their job or career.

Unfortunately, nationwide, more than 90 percent of professional mentorship program participants when asked rated their programs to be ineffective. The primary reasons are a lack of training for mentors and a lack of structure for the overall program. Just because a person knows how to do something, doesn’t mean they know how to pass that knowledge along. In the most effective mentoring programs, mentors learn how to develop high-level thinking skills in another, how to overcome generational and cultural differences and how to effectively share their network with their protégé.